Packing Up

I was packing
Performing all of the customary actions necessary when moving
Shuffling boxes and separating items
Stuffing suitcases
Stuffing suitcases
He noticed

I struggled with the zipper
Pulling forward and forcing backward
Pressing and pushing
I sat on the bag, pressing my weight down
pressing my weight down
He smiled at my theatrics

Standing, exasperated
I contemplated my situation
Could I remove the items?
Starting from scratch would be time-consuming
I didn’t know what I could afford to leave behind
What could I leave behind?
He moved toward me

My hands gripped the resistant zipper
I could risk leaving the bags partially unzipped
The risk would be embarrassment
Items better left hidden slipping out for all to see
I shook my head knowing this wasn’t an option
this wasn’t an option
He grabbed my hands

I felt his warmth as he guided my hands
We opened the suitcase
like a jack in the box wound tightly the covered items spilled out
He grabbed them and cast them aside one by one
“You don’t need these where we’re going”
“Leave the unnecessary behind”

I gasped at his suggestion
I would risk being naked
bared to the world
uncomfortable
I protested
resisted
He smiled

I felt like a silly girl
He seemed so worldly
What did he know that I didn’t?
Where was this utopia?
I doubted
He reassured me

I looked down at the scattered cargo
Things he suggested I leave behind
Anger, hurt, discomfort and discontent
cast aside by his simple gesture
Unhappiness sat piled on top of resentment
Regret heaped on past experience
What had he left me?

I glanced in the suitcase
what would I wear in this new place
how would I be protected?
It would just be me
unburdened yes but raw
“What have you left me?”
He pointed

This bag seemed foreign to me
I felt I would miss the things I had carried for years
neatly folded was
comfort and security
wrapped in a blanket of nurture
and love took up the center of the suitcase
love was there
nothing more

How easily it closed
It was lightly carried
He picked it up
and wrapped me in his arms
I needed nothing more
and had no concerns
where I was going
there would be
love

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